At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize