It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
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All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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