He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
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