Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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