$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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