why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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