Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
