Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
it wasn't lemon gatorade
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?