Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
The power of my boobs compel you
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
