I must be too annoying 4 u.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Your cock deserves a montage
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
