He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
