You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
