Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
