OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I accidentally had phone sex last night
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
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