I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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