I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
where are my eyebrows?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize