the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
