Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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