Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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