You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
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Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
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We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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