So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
