So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize