why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Randomize
