At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize