How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
