That's intense
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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