I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
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He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
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A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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