i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize