I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You need a sexual gate keeper
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize