Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
