I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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