"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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