i don't like sucking hair
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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