we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
