What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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