oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
