To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
