I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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