shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
