I can't watch pbs sober anymore
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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