if you like me you must not know who I am
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
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