guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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