Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
