I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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