Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
