And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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