We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I love you.
Bad choice
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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