Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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