well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
