Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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